Let me start by saying that I judge. I am not going to hide it because it is human nature. Those individuals who say they don’t judge are liars……see what I did there. I enjoy people who use disclaimers. When you use the words “no judgement” in any part of a sentence, you have already set the tone, because you have formed your opinion of the situation. Just because you say that your aren’t doesn’t mean you didn’t. See, I judge people who say they don’t judge.
Recently, I had formed an opinion on an individual. Being truthful, I will admit that there are times when my judgement has been incorrect. I am all about second chances. Maybe they were having a bad day. I don’t know, so another opportunity is usually warranted. On a more recent interaction with this person, my original conclusion was on point. They have nothing that is appealing that would warrant me having any sort of relationship with them. Not everyone is my cup of tea.
Now, let’s tone it down a notch, I am not overly judgmental. I just use it to weed out situations or relationships that aren’t deserving of my time. Let’s also stipulate that I don’t normally share those judgmental thoughts freely. They are mine and mine alone. I don’t use them in a mean-spirited way. (Well, maybe in my head that could be classified as a bad neighborhood.)
I do know that while I may not have all the information about a person or situation, there is usually enough there for me to form an opinion. We all do this. It is as natural as brushing your teeth. It is important to note, that I approach most everything in my life with an open mind and heart. Experience warrants that my time is precious, valuable, and non-refundable, so I am wiser about the relationships that I invest in and the situations that I engage with, in an effort to not make the same mistakes that are exhibited in the past. People might disagree with my assessment and that is fine because everyone is entitled to their own opinion. Being “judgy” has saved me in countless ways.