Stepping on My Tongue

I can only describe yesterday afternoon as an avalanche.   An avalanche of change, concern, and then just plain annoyance.   Being a mother to a special needs child or adult  – as he keeps reminding me – along with caring for my 86 year old mother could even rock the Dalai Lama.  Most days are a breeze.  If I don’t get a phone call regarding either of them, it is a good day.  Yesterday, well, let’s just say, I was grateful to have plans to dine with friends to simply escape.

Bailey’s job situation is changing.  Not his job per say, but the two people who have truly been a stable force in his placement are leaving.   They were the ones who took a chance on him.   Change is hard, but inevitable.   Let me say in this situation, I hate change.    Then there were calls regarding my mother which always breeds anxiety.  Nothing bad. Just trying to navigate the aging process.   The icing on the cake was the response from the passive-aggressive individual whose email the previous day made me want to scream.  Breathe in the good shit……exhale the bullshit.

In all of these instances, I simply maintained composure. Okay, I did cry talking to the woman who is leaving where Bailey is employed.  I was encouraging, sympathetic, and best of all, I was able to simply allow these situations to be whatever they are going to be.  All is really well even if – for a brief second – I didn’t exactly see it that way.    What I am learning is that I don’t really have to say anything at all.  My opinion isn’t going to change anything especially if no one asked for it.

 

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One thought on “Stepping on My Tongue

  1. You are amazing and I love hearing about your life and trials…most of the time I am right there with you….can I use your line “Breathe in the good shit ….exhale the bullshit”. That is a jewel! M

    Like

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