Part of my self-improvement enhancements is to become less judgmental. Now, before you get excited, it is not the intent to not judge at all, but to find a happy balance. I find that when my focus is other people and analyzing what they are doing or not doing, I have turned my back on me.
First off, it is none of my business what other people are doing. Their decisions, their way of living, their choices……all have nothing to do with me. I think my ego is the biggest obstacle. My ego tells me that EVERYTHING is about me. It is an unreliable source and if I listen to it, then I become a crazy person trying to dissect other people’s actions. It truly isn’t worth my peace of mind.
I can have an observation, a feeling, or quite possibly, be in a state of wonder over another’s life choices, but the moment I cross that line where I am obsessed with understanding them, well, then I have just bought a one-way ticket to crazy land. I am trying to simply shake my head and move on because it isn’t their job to help me understand their motives.
Part of this process is understanding that most of my judgment is a trigger for something deeper. Sometimes it is simply the fear of loss. Fear can be a huge catalyst. It is a defense mechanism used to survive.
This exercise is shifting my way of looking at things will be hard. It is human nature to jump to conclusions in an effort to comfort ourselves. But, what I am learning, is that when I get out of my bad neighborhood aka my head, those judgments can float in and out without creating a wave of destruction internally. When I am truly honest with myself about why something someone else does affects me, then I can move forward in peace.