Searching

It is no secret that I am on the prowl.  Not like a meat seeking animal, but much like a woman in search of her niche.   Sure, I am writing.  I am staying relevant in a world where freelance writing is an extreme sport.   Everyone is jockeying for position, so in order to stay in the race, you must continue the pace.    I dabble in the writing that fills me up while I cultivate my craft that is publishable and financially beneficial.   This career is not for the faint of heart.

While I reside in the space of the unknown, my adorable spouse apparently has taken on the role of job finder.    I don’t remember such a position being discussed, but I think he is doing it to humor me and himself.   The first position was an online English teacher.  I had seen this listing before and glossed over it.   Mainly because I can barely teach the people living here correct English, why would I want to do that with complete strangers?  Randomly he also picked dog walker as a possible career choice.   His reasoning is that I love dogs.  That is great but I have two codependent Basset hounds that probably wouldn’t take kindly to leaving them behind to spend time with other canines.  Neither of these job opportunities rings my bell.

There is no longer discomfort in this empty space.   What I am aware of is that filling up space with things that don’t bring me joy is a waste.  I love the opportunity to just wait and see what is on the horizon.    The impatience is gone and is replaced with an odd sense of knowing.  Knowing that my niche is slowing being discovered.   That my trust in this process will reveal opportunities that I couldn’t have imagined.  In the meantime, I will humor my job searching husband and simply say, “thank you”.

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