Part of living my truth is acknowledging that I don’t have all the answers. While I bask in a relaxing trip with girlfriends, life is continuing. Situations are arising that were unexpected and decisions are needing to be made. There is a part of me that wishes that when I am separated from my family unit, everything would simply simmer – similar to an extensive television commercial – and awaits for my return, but that is delusional. God is serving up some plot twists, I suppose, to keep us on our toes.
I am not going to share in depth what is occurring, but I will say that we are in the thick of caring for aging relatives. The process is hard to watch unfold and I am very much aware of how much I need to be in the solution. Sometimes that is simply sitting back and not doing anything. That is the only action needed.
There is a sense of guilt that I am experiencing as I take my adult timeout. That by being away, I am not pulling my weight. But, when I shift my perception, I realize that I can’t fix the aging process. I can’t control how life unfolds, but I can be grateful that my family steps up. That we support each other whether I am physically present or not. We are not geographically impaired.
My day ended yesterday with a call from Bailey telling me that his team won their first Special Olympics softball game of the season. His infectious excitement smoothed the worry, fear and uncertainty that has gathered in my heart. You see, he simply trusts in the process and I need to be a little more like him.